LONDON (DS) - The world united over the weekend in an awareness concert series designed to raise awareness of the environmental damage caused by awareness concerts. Former Presidential candidate and rabid environmentalist Al Gore was the main force behind the Live Earth event in which hundreds of artists across all seven continents banded together to warn people of the ecological dangers of awareness concerts. The concert series lasted for 24 hours, with many people leaving their televisions on all night to record the event even though the TiVo works just fine with the television off.
Gore opened the concert series via hologram speech projected in Tokyo. "Hello, I'm Al Gore, you might remember me from the time I won the 2000 election," Gore said. "But I'm not here to talk about that, I'm here to talk about the crisis our planet is in. Each year hundreds of millions of people of all ages drive, fly, and slash-and-burn through rainforests to attend awareness concerts. From Anti-Nuclear Power concerts to HIV Benefit concerts to Victims of Akon concerts, we are slowly killing our planet."
"We can't keep doing this!" exclaimed Madonna to the 90,000 people collected at Wembley stadium. The pop princess warned the crowd that if concert series such as Live Earth continue, the planet will be incapable of sustaining concert series such as Live Earth. "Tell your friends! Tell your relatives! The world has to know!" she shouted at the audience, who appreciatively raised their plastic cups full of beer that was produced thousands of miles from London. Madonna then furiously humped a boombox for the remaining 40 minutes of her set. |
